home.

home is a relative concept. is it where you keep your stuff and crash out at night? or is it a feeling? i'd have to go with the former...or the latter...for some reason i can't remember which one is which at the moment, some literary genius i am. not that i ever claimed to be. i digress. to me home is a feeling. (wow the to be verbs are taking over, please excuse the poor prose, i'm a little out of it) i can't honestly tell you i ever feel at home where i happen to be laying my head, at least for the last few years, because somehow it has little to do with comfort and freedom, which are the perks of some living situations. i'm trying to find the right words to describe this feeling, because its an extreme, a full feeling of completeness and safety, an assurance that no matter what kind of bad things happen you'll be okay, i'll be okay. the easiest way for me to capture this surprisingly elusive emotion, for me, is to hop on a bus who's destination belongs to the 212 area code. as soon as i see light at the end of the lincoln tunnel its like something is lifted from my being, some how all that pollution makes me breath easier. by this time if you know me at all it doesn't take much, i don't have to have plans or a specific destination, hell when i lived in the city one of my favorite things to do on a saturday was get on a train and get off somewhere random and just explore. yesterday was such a day, where i couldn't take one more day in allentown, i needed to breath again, i needed to feel at home. so i bummed around most of the day, central park, rockefeller plaza, west village...up to see sol at school in harlem. woot. and finally spent a good hour bumming around time square (very unlike me in general, but let me tell you, m&m world was SWEET!). no matter how tired i was or alone or whatever, ji was perfectly content, just chilling on random park benches and reading my book, or chillin on a boulder in central park to write for a while. i need adderall to sit still that long anywhere else. i can't say this feeling is exclusive to manhattan, because i've felt it a time or two in other locations, but in those situations it was who i inhabited that environment with and not the environment itself. then again i'll always love new york more than any other human being...because she's rarely ever let me down....except in july 06...but that trip even had its moments. on some level this is all that one conversation from garden state...which even abe thinks is a halfway decent movie so it can't be that bad.

currently reading: legacy of the force: betrayl (as soon as i locate it...it seems to have run away)
currently listening to: bandcamp. (miss them:()
is there any other decently good current things to list?
probably not.

oh and why did my computer change daylight savings time already when it hasn't happened yet?
i don't know who my computer thinks he is.
pleasant salutations to you.
farewell.