pants

i have this pair of pants, a men's 32x30, i don't understand men's pants sizes so i don't know what that means, except that they don't fit me, they once belonged to someone very skinny. every time i come across this pair of pants i've forgotten that they've been in my posession. this time they were at the bottom of one of those bins underneath my bed, i was cleaning them out to try and get stuff ready to leave. i don't know why i brought them to school with me, i guess for posterity or something. i don't remember packing them. part of me wants to toss them down the trash shoot, so i never come across them again, but there will always be a piece of me that hangs on, that won't let go. even now at this moment when love has re-entered my life. i was picking junk off of my floor, because it always builds up there, i'm a mess, and the pants were lying there, after i found them in the bin i cast them aside without too much thought. tonight i picked them up and held them too me, closely, still searching for some answer i'll never find, some answer that doesn't exist.

someday...maybe...