she never knows

my mother has this tendency to say things, and in this case i'm sure she didn't even realize what she said, didn't know the nerve it would hit, and if she had at one point known i'm sure she forgot, because why wouldn't she, everyone else has...
ok so what she said, we were talking about the fact that i had tiny gauges in my ears, and asking me if i had any other tattoos or piercings at this point that she didn't know about, and at that point she said that she was sure stephen wasn't paying for a tattoo, wasn't tattooing "property of..." on me. of course he wasn't, stephen is a republican's republican, he doesn't even approve of tattoos, all the more reason i will be getting one as soon as i have ID and a job (but that's beside the point), anyway when she said that there was one thing that hit me, and basically its the time of the year, its all on my mind anyway, so i went digging through my xanga archive until i found this...

Monday, September 01, 2003

Tomorrow is my birthday!!! Tomorrow is my birthday...la la la la la....okay I'll stop now. It is also the first day of my senior year...woo hoo! Andy is supposed to pick me up and take me in, but I haven't really talked to him since Saturday night so I don't know if that'll actually happen. Yeah, Saturday night we went to the fair, with his friends John and Megan and their kids...it was really fun! And you wanna hear something ober teen movie romantic...he kissed me at the top of the ferris wheel! I know cheesy...but adorable just the same. He met my mom now too...which went well, he also gave me an ober lecture on the way home from the fair about looking at things positively instead of negatively...whenever I get depressed or upset I'm supposed to think of atleast five things that are going good at the moment...no matter how little they are...he is soo sweet, I'm so lucky...we're so lucky we found eachother. Btw...I know we aren't bringing the "L" word into this yet, way too soon for that but he made some joke the other night about tatooing "Property of (Insert his full name here)" across my chest...what more of a commitment can I ask for than that...he wants to brand me!! okay well, GH throw back episode is on soapnet so I g2g... Much Love

so yeah...i guess it just triggered thinking of that...i don't know how the next couple weeks are going to be like, you'd think two years would erase this stuff from my memory, i don't know if a million years will.

thats all for now, i'm going to go cry myself into oblivion, have a good night.